[received some positive feedback on this series, so I'll just continue as I gradually empty out the ol' trash emails. I have to say that some of these...especially some of the comments...have STRONGLY TEMPTED me to break my longstanding "No Interaction With Reddit" policy. However, I have...so far...managed to hold firm]
Dear JB:My friend group has recently gotten into D&D and I took on the mantle of DMing. I have run a series of 1 shots for the table and we're trying out a little campaign to see how it goes. So far I have maybe run 7-8 games total between 1 shots and the campaign since fall 2024, and still am quite new obviously and have to pause to look up rules here and there.On two different occasions the same player has not told me the ruling on a spell, swinging the fight wildly in his favor. On the first instance he kept using a spell that required concentration, and didn't tell me that it required concentration, nor did he mention it when he was hit multiple times. On the second occasion he used a spell that hindered my big boss creature useless, and didn't tell me until the last round of combat that the boss could have been making saves to escape.I trust the other players to tell me the full spell effect, as we are all learning, but I get the sense that this player is holding the information back intentionally. On both instances I have asked what the spell does when he casts it, but that info was left out.Is this on me as a DM to learn the spells more quickly to rule things better, or should the player be accountable for things like remembering concentration checks or telling me that creatures can escape his spells? In both instances I learned what the spells have done and am ruling them correctly since.While I know I could look the spells up, asking what they did was trying to accomplish that same thing as the players have them written down.Either way, we are having fun and growing in our understanding of the game as a group which is lovely :)
My Mistake Or Cheating?
Dear MMOC:
You are the Dungeon Master. You are responsible for what happens at the table. This is ENTIRELY on YOU.
As the DM for the game, it is your role to be arbiter of the rules and your responsibility to understand and know those rules...and it is imperative that YOU know the rules at least as well as your players. At many tables, the DM will be the person with the most knowledge of the game system being played...but, of course, for a new DM there is always a period of learning that goes on when you must search up rules and references, slowing down play. That's all part of the process, and ALL of us who act as DM has had to go through it to one degree or another. Hell, I've been playing for more than 40 years and I still have to look up spell and monster and magic item descriptions to check durations or job my memory about some game effect or other.
For most DMs, this NEVER GOES AWAY. The main difference between me and you, is that A) I've committed huge heaps of the rules to memory, and B) my ability to search out, find, and reference needed information is much, much faster (based on years of experience). But unless you have eidetic memory, I'd doubt anyone's ability to run ANY edition of D&D "book free." You can make and use cheat sheets (I do this), but mainly you just have to accept that D&D is a complex game and you are only human.
Your player may be a nefarious conniver or he may be an idiot newbie or me have been completely innocent; regardless, none of that matters. What matters is YOU shirking your responsibility, YOU being lazy, YOU not taking the time to read and reference the spells being used in the game and instead relying on your player to do your job for you. THAT is the issue, MMOC. The only thing the players have (some) authority over is their own character...everything else is in the hands of the Dungeon Master. When you delegate away knowledge (as you did here) you undermine your own authority...the authority that is the very foundation of a functional game. There is no game without a Dungeon Master. Even individuals who play the game solo (yes, there is such a thing as solo D&D play) are simply acting as their own Dungeon Master.
Without the foundational stability of a DM's authority...an authority that comes from both knowledge of the game and the trust of the players...that campaign will inevitably collapse.
Fortunately, your game is new enough that it shouldn't be too difficult regain control of the situation. Learn the rules of the game. Study the rules of the game. Pay especial attention to rules that pertain to the player characters (class abilities, spells) and circumstances most pertinent to your game. Make yourself a subject matter expert...and in-play give yourself the time and patience to look up the odd rule or system that you can't recall. That way you can exercise your authority based on actual knowledge of the game and build the trust in your players that you're willing and able to do the work.
Sincerely,
JB
Late comment,
ReplyDeleteReading this has made me realize just how unusual my gaming experience was. By the time I started DMing in early high school I'd been a player in my dad's game for nearly a decade and been reading and studying the rulebooks for a couple years(middle school at least). So by the point I started running games my dad was already using me as an assistant DM kinda, because I knew the rules as well or better than him(he has dyslexia so reading the rules was always hard for him). And in running other games I always read the entire rulebook front to back and don't run until I feel comfortable with the rules. So I've never been in this position of not knowing the rules or knowing where to easily find them in the book. Even as a player I'm usually the one with the most knowledge of the rules, not that I'm a rules lawyer, it's just how things work out because most people are too lazy to read. And that's what it really comes down to, laziness. Just read the manual(in this case rulebook) and maybe these problems can be avoided.
Yeah...probably in a perfect world, what you experienced would probably be the "basic training" for most, if not all DMs.
DeleteI didn't learn to play with an older person / mentor. I had the Basic (Moldvay authored) manual, and I read it obsessively (because it was awesome!), over and over, before I had a chance to run the game for my friends. In addition to being short, straightforward, and competently written, it has a good ToC, index, and glossary...all things I was familiar with thanks to my elementary school education.
The books that followed (the Expert set, the AD&D books) were much the same...though once we switched to AD&D there was at least some 'group gestalt' taking place. Multiple people had copies of (some of) the books, and we'd read them in our spare time (we were all readers back then), and then we could correct mistakes in play that came up, learning together from our shared pool of knowledge.
But I can see the benefits of doing it the way you did.
But even you who didn't have a mentor read the book before playing. A lot of advice online is that dms don't need to read the book or that they should rely on the players to know their character abilities, etc. this is just pure laziness, yes the 5e books(and many other rpg books) are overwitten and poorly organized, but guess what? that's nothing new and they are choosing to run with those books. Hell I've read all the 5e books and I don't even run the game! My dad who has extreme difficulty reading due to his dyslexia, read all 5 box sets of BECMI many times because he basically had to memorize it to understand it because of his difficulty reading, and he'd do the same thing when running new adventure modules(he mentions this in our interview series at one point). And he did that because while it was still a hobby and a somewhat rare family activity, he cared enough to do it right. If my dad with his disability can do that anyone who chooses not to is just lazy and needs to decide if they really want to put in the work needed to be a DM.
ReplyDeleteIn my opinion, obviously, just got me fired up to rant about something I have strong opinions about. :)
A lot of advice on the internet is "not good" advice, man: that's just how it is. While I'd advise not getting too worked up about it (considering all the good THAT does), I am certainly not immune to the righteous indignation you feel about the promotion of garbage ways to "D&D."
DeleteFeel free to come rant on my blog any time you like.
; )