Essential Repurposing (Part 1)

AKA "Fixing Stuff For Fun And Profit"

I'll cut to the chase: I picked up a copy of the D&D Essentials Kit. Yes, I put money in WotC's pocket ($12 and change), although I do have 90 days to return the thing to Target.

The reason for this? I wanted a copy of the included adventure, Dragon of Icespire Peak. I have a bit of a "thing" for white dragons. That may not have been obvious over the years (though the last time I created an adventure with a dragon...nine years ago!...it was a white), but they're probably my second faves, after black dragons. Their Superman-like, liquid nitrogen breath is not only a cool image, and it's a bit easier to justify than a monster that breathes fire...plus, they have the best natural camouflage (IMO) of all the dragons.

I'm rooting for the dragon.

Besides, I dig on snow and ice settings (duh...see Land of Ice for examples); heck, I almost picked up a copy of Frostburn, long after I'd chucked DND3 from my life. Probably would have purchased it, if it'd had a white dragon on the cover.

Anyway, I wanted to see the type of adventure being constructed over at Wizards of the Coast and see if it was anything I might use...or modify...for my own ends. Here's what my $13 bought me:

- An "Essentials Kit Rulebook" that I have zero interest in reading. Really. I've read the 5E books, I've played a session (or two?) of 5E, and I've listened to multiple hours of 5E "actual play" podcasts. I know that the game, as it's currently being produced, is extremely irritating to my psyche and outside the sphere of "things-I-want-to-engage-with." I'd go back to AD&D RAW long before I'd sit down to a 5E game session.

[well, not quite RAW. I will never again play AD&D with character limitations based on sex/gender. Yes, we did this in my youth...even our female players, who generally ran fighter characters...but I'm done with that particular brand of machismo stereotype]

- A nice set of (eleven) dice.

- A DMs' screen that has a lovely illustration on it. If I was crafty at all, I'd find some way to cut it up into some sort of decorative doo-dad. Unfortunately, I'm not.

- Some 5E tools (cards for initiative, conditions, magic items) that I probably won't be able to use. Actually, the "sidekick cards" might work fine as a stack of random NPCs.

- A map of the Sword Coast portion of the Forgotten Realms campaign setting.

- The 64 page adventure book that was my impetus for buying the box.

Let's see, anything else? Some blank (5E) character sheets. A box for holding cards. Some codes to unlock additional on-line content (not sure if I need to be enrolled in D&D Beyond to use that). Eh. All-in-all, I suppose it's not a bad value for a "starter set"...dice alone would probably cost $5-6. What price would you put on 14 easily re-purposed "dungeon" maps; a quarter a piece? Maybe $.50 to $1, given that they include some possible ideas/inspiration in the text?

Maybe. They aren't great. If you're interested in WHY they're "not great" (or, as some might say, "terrible") I'd direct you to this recent ggnore podcast (episode 175) for the informed opinion of a group of regular 5E users who bothered to play through most of the adventure (their actual play podcasts...about 12 hours worth...comprise four or five of their earlier episodes).

But I already knew that...I mean I did research the thing before I bought it.

Here's the thing, though: I (me) am not quite ready to say the ideas here are "terrible." Many of the quests presented here (the term used to describe the dozen plus micro adventures that make up the whole of this mini-campaign) aren't anything worse than what I'd come up with for a single session or two at the table. Maybe that says more about me (and my lack of creativity), but not every adventure need be a giant, six level dungeon filled with world-destroying threats nor does every event occurring in a campaign require some sort of clever inter-woven story/plot construction. Sometimes a simple kernel of an encounter can yield hours of entertainment.

The real problem, in my opinion, is more one of execution...that is to say, I'm not the fan of how these quests/adventures are supposed to unfold. And that is mainly a 5E issue rather than a lack of imagination on the part of the author. The Essentials Kit wants to provide an introductory adventure (rid this region of its dragon problem), that's a bit too steep in challenge for a a band of newbie adventurers. So it provides a bunch of "warm-up" adventures that the player characters will need to grind in order to achieve the requisite power level to face the ultimate encounter (the eponymous dragon).

Grind is the operative word here...there is little reward offered in any of the adventures, save for the promised leveling that comes with the completion of the "quests." Players need to seek out and check off every notice on the town's job board in order to achieve the necessary milestones (i.e. "auto-level ups") that will eventually (around 6th level) allow them to face down the dragon. Since treasure means little to the 5E character (most of their best upgrades come from levels not equipment...and gold doesn't earn XP) there's nothing to really motivate characters except what "meta" story you want to give your party.

Hell, even the dragon has bupkis in the way of treasure (whoops! SPOILER). One would imagine that the main incentive for fighting a dragon would be, you know, claiming its hoard or getting showered with gold by a grateful community. Not here! The dragon of Icespire Peak is broke as a joke...it lairs on the roof of a ruined castle, eating the occasional mountain orc that it manages to catch, and has exactly zero as far as a hoard. The grateful villagers? Well, the townmaster "might plan a feast in the heroes honor" (emphasis added by yours truly).

So there's very little reason I can think of for a group of adventurers to hang around an area being threatened by a dragon, let alone take the time to grind a bunch of step-and-fetch/kill adventures for little reward beside the leveling. It reminds me quite a bit of a video game script...but if I wanted to play a video game I'd be doing that. Video games do video games better than tabletop RPGs do.

And just in case anyone's wondering, this isn't a rant...it's just weary observation.

Back to the point: Dragon of Icespire Peak isn't a great adventure, but that's mainly due to 5E not being a great system. Oh, I know folks love 5E and all that (or are resigned to playing it or whatever) but for my money (and I did spend actual money on this thing) you really start to see the warts on the thing when you look at this kind of product. The ggnore boyz say it's the best WotC adventure since Phandelver...but based on some reviews I've read, that may be damning with faint praise.

Still, I do love white dragons. I love them as a feature monster, not just some knightly mount or frost giant pet. I think they do make a good antagonist for a party of low level adventurers: a sizable (though not insurmountable) risk to balance against a presumably rich reward. That IS what Dungeons & Dragons is supposed to be about after all, right? You defeat the dragon, you divvy up the spoils.

What I'd like to do...now...is rewrite the adventure. Make it a little more "old school friendly;" something with a B/X (or even AD&D) sensibility. File off the serial numbers, prune the edges, maybe slap an OGL on it and sell the PDF for a couple bucks. Try my best to make the thing a bit more useable as a campaign jumpstart.

Would anyone have any objections to me giving it a go?

My favorite white dragon pic.

For the Love of God...

...please, PLEASE stop using "ability checks."

Ability checks are nothing but sheer f'ing laziness, whether we're talking "roll under" or "roll versus target with ability bonuses." Just stop it. StoooooOOOOP IT, please!

Stop mistaking characters for something other than the player who's playing the character. Just stop. Stop now. If I am playing a character with a high Intelligence score that doesn't make him a frigging genius...and if he has a low Intelligence score it doesn't make him an imbecile. Nor does a specific Charisma or Wisdom score represent aspects of my personality (i.e. the player's personality) that I am obligated to play. It doesn't! It is unfortunate that the name carries connotations that expand the mechanic beyond the scope of what it's intended for but...well let's just talk sense for a moment.

Let's start with "Intelligence." Forget the name for the moment. Just forget it. Call it something else...anything! Call it "Wizard's Prime Requisite" (which it is...originally anyway). Call it "ability X" for all I care. Just divorce the mechanic from the connotation that comes with naming it "intelligence." Let's just call it "X" for now...or, better yet, call it "INT."

INT is a random attribute that determines how skilled a magic-user character is at learning his or her craft. That was the thing's original definition. Later, this wasn't simply designated mechanically with the acquisition of experience points (bonuses and penalties to XP) , but also included how well the magic-user learned spells (chances to learn, minimum/maximum numbers per level). Parenthetically it also provided a number of extra languages the character might know, presumably because it represented some sort of scholarly pursuits, even if the character was not trained specifically in the skills of a magic-user.

That's it. It doesn't mean a character is more perceptive: lots of well-read or knowledgable individuals are hopelessly obtuse about all sorts of things. A high intelligence doesn't equate with the ability to solve riddles or craft wooden furniture. Having an INT of 18 doesn't make someone "MacGuyver." It doesn't even mean the character is a particularly good student...except insofar as we're talking about being a student of magic. But you can be a stupid, stupid person and still great at your job. Happens all the time. D&D is not about "renaissance men (and women)" skilled in a variety of tasks and careers.

Wisdom isn't a stat that measures how "wise" or "intuitive" or "insightful" is your character. It's a measure of your character's ability to advance as a cleric. Again, forget the the word "wisdom;" it's a short-hand term, and a confusing one. Just call it WIS. Later editions provided that it made clerics even better (by giving them additional spells). For the non-clerics it acted as an adjustment to saving throws versus magic (though why exactly was never really made clear...certainly this was a late development in a game that mechanically went nearly unchanged between the mid-70's and 1999). You can be an extremely devoted zealot, well-versed in the tenets of your religion...or a doubter and closet agnostic who nevertheless has a firm grip on the ways of "universal (divine) law." Despite the name given to the ability, an 18 WIS doesn't make you wise; there's nothing "wise" about being an adventurer. There's nothing "wise" about joining a band of cutthroats and delving into ancient mines and tombs full of horrible ways to die. It is a MECHANIC with an unfortunate name, nothing more.

Charisma? It's not a measure of your personality. It's a measure of your abstract "it" factor, how much people naturally trust you and your immediate likability. It gives a bonus or penalty to reaction, something only checked in an initial encounter...your ability to make a first impression, probably based as much on your carriage, manner of speech, and straightness of teeth as much as anything else. Why do some people attract sycophants and fantastical followers while others have a tougher time making friends? Why do some people get elected president despite being eminently unqualified for the position? Why are some people blessed with popularity even when their words and actions are sheer nonsense? Eventually, all but the unfortunate few will see through the facade to a person's true worth based on his or her actual actions...and the length of time that takes to become disillusioned can be slowed or speeded depending on the depth to which that initial first impression got made. But it happens eventually...and probably sooner if the person shows herself to be a monster right from the get-go.

The same holds true of all the ability scores. Strength is a measure of fighting ability, not athletic ability. Originally, dexterity measure only marksmanship; later it was used to measure thieving ability (both as a thief's prime requisite and in bonuses/penalties to thief skills). Constitution adjusts a character's ability to withstand damage, not her ability to resist disease or hold her breath or sustain a sprint over distance.

I'm sorry, but I'm irritated. Hell, I'm angry. I'm mad at 5th edition and 4th edition and 3rd edition and 2nd edition (with its non-weapon proficiencies) and BECMI's "General Skills" (from the Gazetteers and, later, the Rules Cyclopedia). Hell, I'm mad at Tom Moldvay's admonition on page B60 of the B/X (Basic) Rules that:

"The DM may want to base a character's chance of doing something on his or her ability scores...to perform a difficult task (such as climbing up a rope or thinking of a forgotten clue), the player should roll the ability score or less on 1d20."

Bullshit. Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit!

Characters are trained in the skills of their class. They're not "renaissance men (and women)." They are not taking night courses at community college. They're not hitting the gym or practicing aerial aerobics. They're not shelling out money at the hot yoga studio to increase their flexibility and focus. They're not researching the internet for the best diets to and exercises to maintain health and fitness, nor to see how to build a rowboat from scratch or live off the land or fletch their own arrows. WE can do that...even in the days before the internet we had libraries and city colleges and trade schools and a military industrial complex capable of churning out trained soldiers from hopelessly soft civilians in a matter of months based on carefully crafted science of physical and mental conditioning. But that's us...21st century people.

Stop using ability scores to define the character holistically. It's a terrible simplification. Gygax would have done well to have NEVER suggested the inclusion of "secondary skills" in AD&D, but even he provided a near-20% chance of a character having NO SKILL OF MEASURABLE WORTH. A fighter is trained to kill people, not forge and repair armor, not execute standing broad jumps or pole vault or climb like a spider. Thieves are trained to steal (in various ways); they are not tumblers and acrobats, no matter what their DEX score is. Acrobats are trained to do these kinds of things, and I encourage anyone to add such a class to their game if they find those skills desirable (I even wrote up an "acrobat" for The Complete B/X Adventurer). But don't look at a 16 dexterity as an 80% chance to perform such feats. Knowing one set of skills doesn't translate to another set (see professional soccer players versus professional baseball players versus professional ballet dancers).

Stop with the ability checks. Your wizard's 18 intelligence means she's an impressively knowledgable wizard for her level of experience. It doesn't make her an impressively intelligent person. It doesn't make her better at finding secret doors or sussing out ambush's or identifying things she's had no experience with. Your cleric's 18 wisdom makes her an impressively accomplished cleric for her level of experience...it doesn't mean she's wise. She's only as wise as YOU, the player, make her. If you decide to open the chest without searching for traps or decide it's a good idea to make a deal with a greater demon, there's ZERO RESPONSIBILITY on the DM to have you reconsider these un-wise actions. The stat is called "wisdom" but that's just a word; stop thinking of it as more than a term.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry to irritate people. I'm sorry to once again yell about things that are indelibly ingrained into some (most) D&D players' psyches, wasting everyone's blessed time, especially my own. But I was once again reading some blog on which someone was (once again) complaining about some aspect of 5E ability checks they didn't like...as if some checks were "good" and others were bad...and just, no. No. Stop the madness. There are no "good" ability checks. There are no good "skill systems" for D&D. Your character class tells you what you can do. Your ability scores might adjust some aspects of effectiveness. But YOU, player: YOU are the one responsible for working with what you've got. I don't care what your character's Intelligence or Charisma is. Your Strength and Dexterity scores mean jack-all to me outside the adjustments the game rules explicitly provide. If you can't figure stuff out, tough shit.

You need a boat? Buy one or pay someone to build it for you. You're not boatbuilder. This isn't MacGuyver; it's D&D. Boatbuilder isn't an available character class.

Stop with the ability checks already.
[vented at 2am]

Madhouse

This place...Paraguay...is a madhouse. In so many ways, but today especially, what with everyone in the city preparing for yet another four day weekend. It's like the locusts have descended and are devouring everything...except we're talking the supermarkets and marketplaces, rather than the fields. All I wanted was some yogurt for the kids. And some fruit. Oh...and beer. But...just madness. These folks are preparing for siege or something.

Anyway, Tuesday is "chore day" around this neck o the woods, and the traffic and general chaos rendered it an all too "get nothing done all day" day. Which sucks but whatever. I'm in the middle of writing a waaaaay too long post on The Land of the Lost (among other things) that I started yesterday, but I don't know if/when it will get finished/posted. It may need to be serialized...but, then again, it may not be interesting enough to be worth the bother.

[ooo...which reminds me that I need to do a post about "self-doubt" one of these days]

So rather than give folks nothing, here's a fun little survey that will answer that oft-posed question to yourself, "What D&D Character Am I?" Go check it out; it's a fun little java that will spit out your class-race-alignment combo, complete with ability scores. For those who care, here's mine:

I Am A: Lawful Good Human Fighter (6th Level)

Ability Scores:
Strength-13
Dexterity-15
Constitution-13
Intelligence-14
Wisdom-15
Charisma-14

Alignment:
Lawful Good A lawful good character acts as a good person is expected or required to act. He combines a commitment to oppose evil with the discipline to fight relentlessly. He tells the truth, keeps his word, helps those in need, and speaks out against injustice. A lawful good character hates to see the guilty go unpunished. Lawful good is the best alignment you can be because it combines honor and compassion. However, lawful good can be a dangerous alignment when it restricts freedom and criminalizes self-interest.

Race:
Humans are the most adaptable of the common races. Short generations and a penchant for migration and conquest have made them physically diverse as well. Humans are often unorthodox in their dress, sporting unusual hairstyles, fanciful clothes, tattoos, and the like.

Class:
Fighters can be many things, from soldiers to criminal enforcers. Some see adventure as a way to get rich, while others use their skills to protect the innocent. Fighters have the best all-around fighting capabilities of the PC classes, and they are trained to use all standard weapons and armor. A fighter's rigorous martial training grants him many bonus feats as he progresses, and high-level fighters have access to special melee maneuvers and exotic weapons not available to any other character.

Find out What Kind of Dungeons and Dragons Character Would You Be?, courtesy of Easydamus (e-mail)

The survey/game stats are D20-based and, yes, it's possible to return a multi-classed character or non-human. I should note that, according to the survey FAQ:

Adventurers tend to have higher [ability] scores than the rest of the population. This test takes that into account. The test doesn't give you your 3d6 self, but your 4d6 self. So most scores would be one or two points lower in "real" life.

Which suddenly means my ability scores make a lot more sense. I was wondering how I ended up with a 13 (above average) Strength score, for instance. Sure, I've done some yoga, but 11 seems a lot more accurate. Especially considering I was answering questions with "I'm sick most of the time," and "I have a hard time running" (in hindsight, neither of these are incredibly accurate, but they seemed better answers than my other choices. Per the FAQ, however, I was supposed to err "up" rather than down).

"Here I come to save the day..."

I was not terribly surprised by the results, however. Lawful Good is pretty close to my real life perspective (though I don't think I've ever played a D&D character that was LG), and human fighter, well...yeah. I'm kind of a neanderthal.

[I actually thought I might end up a druid with answers like "I hate the city" and "Nature is greater than Technology" and stuff. Nope. Per the detailed notes, my next highest class was a tie between Bard, Cleric, and Paladin. Yeah, I'm not really into camping]

The survey stats show that most people taking the quiz fall into the Wizard class, with the second highest being Sorcerer and Ranger. Almost no one shows up as a Barbarian (I'd think you'd have to really make a point of answering the quiz with an eye towards brutality and iconoclasm). I guess you'd expect that from an internet quiz.

All in all, it's not a terrible character...certainly playable. It's too bad it didn't pick my feats and skills for me (I guess it'd need a pretty sophisticated program to do that), but for a 6th level fighter, I suppose I could do the little work required to round it out (oh, wait...I'm human and have a +2 modifier for INT, so I've got to 5 skill points per level to figure? *sigh* maybe not). As B/X character, it would be quite good (and would work since the only fighters ARE humans). Do I really speak more than one language, though? My spanish is pretty terrible...

Like I said, I don't have much time today, so I leave you this to play with. Knock yourselves out!

[and please: if you're a regular reader here, I'd love you to post your results in the Comments section so I can better judge/pigeon-hole you in my mind's eye]
; )

It's Been A Day...

...since I made the mistake of signing up for Quora, and I already hate the thing. What an f'ing waste of everyone's time.

Ugh...sometimes my own stupidity confounds me.

Stop asking me questions that mean nothing! Stop! STOOOOOP!!!

If You Can't Beat 'Em...

I was up till 4am or so and I was thinking, you know, if I was back in Seattle I'd probably be willing to take a crack at playing 5E. I might even throw down for a PHB to see what kind of character builds I could wrangle from the system.

*shudder*

This is probably more a sign of gaming withdrawal then a sign of kindled interest in 5E. And yet, I find that there is interesting stuff to do (still) with the dumb-dumb brain of D&D that my more "serious" concepts can't. I mean, where else can you find a halfling fighter coupled with a dwarf cleric, a half-elven thief, and a human "pick it." Thematically, such a group is ridiculous outside the confines of one's favorite console fantasy game (and I'm really not into video games these days). But in D&D, it's just "the way things are;" I don't think anyone playing D&D with any amount of enjoyment is looking too closely at the logic of the thing. There's nothing terribly logical to it.

And I'd love to play a halfling fighter. Really!
: )

I went so far as to dig out my PDF of 5E "basic" and (mentally) go through the steps of creating such a character...something that would fit the concept in my head, yet still be kind of mechanically badass. I was struck again by just how terrible and incomplete the new "Basic Rules" are...how incomplete they are, while still being needlessly wordy with pages and pages of dross. But even so, a halfling fighter of the kind I envision could be created pretty easily, and better (i.e. more satisfying to me) than any edition ever. Yes, for the kind of ridiculously non-standard character I imagine, the new Basic can make it the best, much as I hate to admit it. I could fall in love with such a character fairly easily...but would the rest of the game as written support my enjoyment of play?

Mmm...maybe not so much.

Something like this guy...but shorter and acrobatic.

Much as I like where my "Holmse-ian Knock-Off" was going (with the ancient South American setting and skill trees and whatnot), is it too serious? Probably. At the expense of fun? Maybe. Would I like to play it? Yes, yes I would...but I'd also like to run a half-orc ranger chick named Hark the Huntress. Just for kicks. 'Cause I'm weird like that.

There's space in my brain for both sides of fantasy...there's just not the time in my life to play both.

[of course, at the moment, there's no time (or opportunity) to play either]

I can list problems with most every edition of D&D...personal dislikes, perhaps, but ones that others have echoed to me over the years. There's stuff about 5th edition I dislike a lot, just with regard to system mechanics (spell inflation, cantrips, "channeling divinity," rogues rolling D8s for Hit Dice?!, and most everything about the wizard class), but there are other bits that I think are pretty good. Being able to create some bizarre character combos is one of those things.

*sigh* Sorry...I don't have much time at the moment, and my brain is a little out of practice for the blogging thing. Last week was fairly hectic. First, my housekeeper (who also acts as my translator for Guaranii and occasional nanny help) did a face-plant off her motorcycle the one day she forgot her helmet here, then there was the four day weekend (happy Paraguayan Teacher's Day! happy Paraguayan Labor Day!) that shut down most everything in town except my wife's work, then there's the normal bullshit like the internet in this country being so very, very subpar. Suffice is to say, with another four day weekend coming up (happy Paraguayan Mother's Day! happy Paraguayan Independence Day!...have I mentioned they really like their holidays here? skipping work and shooting fireworks are major pastimes) and still trying to get the household in order, posting will probably be sporadic and dismal with regard to quality.

Apologies in advance.

[hmmm...upon reflection, perhaps the desire for ridiculous escapism stems from "real life" events]

Anyway...I don't have access to funny shaped dice at the moment, nor do I have any way to purchase hardcover games (the new PHB isn't available as a PDF), so hopefully this madness will pass before I actually blow any cash on WotC. But...well, it's stuck in my mind now. I really do need to do some more reflection on the subject.

Later.

Fucking Assholes

So, yes, I've been busy lately (duh). I won't bore you terribly with the details: traveling to Canada and back, sickness, traveling to D.C. (the "other Washington") and back, "single parent duty," working the job-type-job, Seahawks, beagles, etc. In all honesty, I went into work this morning thinking I'd write up a list of 10 or 20 space opera themed post topics for the next couple weeks, probably beginning with a book I picked up at The Newseum in our nation's capital, Darth Vader and Son. But I never quite got around to it. Mainly 'cause some fucking asshole decided to kill close to 30 fellow humans in Connecticut today, including a score of kindergartners.

2012 has been a "banner year" for this kind of bullshit, and frankly I'm sick of it. Back in April a young woman (age 21) who'd just moved to Seattle for culinary school was hit by a stray bullet in downtown Seattle and killed instantly. In May, a 43 year old software developer was killed by a random bullet while driving his family around town...a random bullet meant for someone else. Later that same month, a man from Ellensburg shot (and killed) four people in a Seattle cafe, before shooting (and killing) a random woman near Town Hall and taking her SUV. He later took his own life when police found and cornered him.

The shooting spree at the Batman movie over the summer actually prompted my wife to suggest that we not expose our child to "violent" superhero characters; as if anything about Batman would inspire a person to commit random acts of murder. A professional football player making piles of cash put nine bullets in the young mother of his own child before putting a bullet in his own head a couple weeks ago. Then, of course, there was the shooting last week in an Oregon shopping mall that claimed the lives of three people and injuring another. As with the football player, the cafe shooter in May, and the asshole from today, one of the lives claimed was his own.

And today...words cannot express how awful this tragedy is. I have nightmare thoughts sometimes about what it would be like to outlive my child...for anything to happen to him, sweet innocent that he is. And tonight, there are the parents of 20 young children who are going through their own personal hell because of something so horrific, I never even imagined it as a possibility. I mean, what kind of fucking asshole does that?

And yet he's dead. The killer is dead. All those Republicans out there who support capital punishment (i.e. the "death penalty") should be happy that justice was "self-served," right? Hell, the guy saved the tax payers a ton of money on trials and prosecution and prison housing and mental institutions, etc. I mean, that gives all those grieving family members the closure they need right?

Bullshit.

Same with the asshole that offed himself in Seattle. Or the asshole that played for the Chiefs. Or the asshole that offed himself in the mall in Oregon. The asshole from the Aurora, Colorado movie theater massacre has been trying to off himself in jail, but probably won't manage to do so before the state does it for him (Colorado continues to carry the death penalty and performed it's last state execution in 1997...I'm guessing the asshole that killed 12 people who just wanted to watch a popcorn action flick...including a six-year old child...will get the lethal injection, too). They're all reaping their "justice" and the grieving families of the victims will continue to grieve in sorrow. Because they are still suffering from the loss of their loved ones and have no good answers to their main question: "Why?"

Why has this happened? Why has it happened to us? Why has it happened to our loved ones? What is the thing we did...in this life or a past one...to deserve this horror, this tragedy? Why was this murderer such an asshole? Why does our "great society" continue to produce these assholes? Why are they able to do what they do?

And of course, when these questions cannot be answered the next ones asked are "What could we have done to prevent this?" "What could we have done to protect ourselves?" "What can we do in the future to ensure this never, ever happens again?"

Get rid of the guns.

I hate guns. I fucking loathe guns. I, quite literally, cannot stand the touch or feel of guns...when I've held handguns before (a .45; a Glock), I dropped 'em like a live grenade.  Like a poisonous snake. Like something violently designed to do harm...to kill...which is exactly what guns are designed to do. They are not designed to be a "neutral tool." They are not manufactured to open stubborn locks or drill holes in a wall for your cable wire. They are created with the purpose of ending life. And they are very, very good at it. Our centuries of technological development have seen vast improvements in this area.

Now, I too have heard that old chestnut about how "guns don't kill people, people kill people," and that's certainly true for the most part...usually, a gun only kills a human when it is pointed at someone and the trigger is pulled by another human. The common argument I hear is that a person with a "will to kill" will find a way to do it, even if he lacks access to a firearm.

And to that I say this: If the asshole in Connecticut had not had access to automatic weapons and large capacity firearms that were purchased legally...if he had instead, say, been forced to use a hunting knife or a ball-peen hammer to do his dirty work...how many people do you think he would have actually managed to kill before he was stopped? How many of the six adults at the elementary school would he have bludgeoned to death before being dragged down and pummeled unconscious? How many children would he have been able to chase down and effectively stab to death before someone clocked him or the police showed up?

The thing that allowed this asshole to inflict the death and suffering on such a horrific scale was his access to guns. That's it...we don't know how many bullets were fired, how many magazines were expended, how many misses were chalked up before his bullets found their victims. But the ability to shoot and shoot and shoot with deadly speed and range and traumatic impact is what allows an asshole to go from "disgruntled crazy guy" to a mass slayer of innocence. It's what turned simple murder into massacre.

The Second Amendment of the U.S. Constitution states:

A well-regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed.

So carry a goddamned sword.

I'm serious; I'm sick of it. The idea that prohibiting the citizenry from owning firearms is going to somehow keep a reign on our country becoming a tyranny or military dictatorship is just loony-tunes. If the U.S. military ever decides to stage a coup and take over, we as a people are royally screwed, regardless of whether or not Joe Citizen has an assault rifle in his gun locker. Back in the 18th century, the British soldiers and the American colonists were armed with the same gear: muskets, sabers, cannon. Have you seen what our military is packing these days? Smart bombs and drones fighters, RPGs and mortars, armored fighting vehicles and stealth bombers and .50 caliber machine guns and nuclear attack subs. Having an assault rifle or hand gun in your possession isn't going to allow you to wage revolution, should all hell break loose. Didn't you folks see the armed "insurrection" in Iraq? You know, back when we invaded their country? Their militia (or freedom fighters or guerillas or whatever you want to call them) didn't stand a chance...we just bombed cities flat to quell resistance. And the same would happen here if there was a citizen uprising in the face of martial law backed up by our U.S. war machine.

The 2nd Amendment is something the NRA hides behind because they don't want anyone telling 'em what they can and can't do. And I can understand that...I don't like being told what to do either. If I'm a smoker, how dare my state pass a law that prohibits smoking inside any public building...what if I own the building and want it to be a smoking establishment? How dare the government tell me what I can and can't do with my own property and my own business? What the heck gives them the right to say I have to stand 25 feet away from a bus shelter (in the rain) to light up a smoke?

I'll tell you what gives them the right: the invested authority of the government by the people to protect its own citizens. Smoking causes great harm. If you want to smoke cigarettes (and slowly kill yourself in the process) that's your business, but you'll not be allowed to inflict cancer on others...even inadvertently...with your second hand smoke. Even if you're always careful to blow your smoke the opposite direction. Your "personal rights" are being "infringed" so that others' rights (to life, in this case) isn't being infringed.

You may have the right to "pursue happiness" but not if exercising that right means stealing someone else's car stereo to buy your crank.

So infringe our goddamned personal rights already: get rid of the guns. They're existence in the hands of ordinary (i.e. non-military, non-law enforcement) folks only causes harm.

[jeez...forgot about that 16 year old kid shot dead by the "citizen watch" asshole in Florida]

Sure, that's going to seem unfair to folks who are well-adjusted, trained in the use of firearms, and capable of keeping their guns under lock-and-key when not on the target range. But it's for the greater good, people. I can drive my car just fine after drinking enough to put me over the "legal limit," but that law (and limit) exists for very good reason. This whole "right to the gun" thing IS the main issue here. It is the presence, and prevalence, of guns in our society that makes it one where "death by gun" has the highest rate of any first world country.

If guns are outlawed, only outlaws will have guns.

Apparently law enforcement doesn't count? Look, at this point, I'm willing to have that line be the case...especially if it makes it more difficult for the assholes of the world (these "quiet, shy" types who have no problems passing their screenings and then go batshit crazy) to acquire the means of inflicting such terrible, terrible tragedy. These perpetrators of massacre aren't knocking over convenience stores and robbing banks...they are simply going into public places and pulling the trigger as fast as they can.

This is awful, awful shit...truly, truly terrible and my heart is bleeding for the families and friends of ALL these gun victims that continue to accrue. You may think it strange that a guy who plays and writes violent role-playing games (especially ones that involve firearms) would be so "anti-gun," but I have long held the opinion and stance that the ONLY place an ordinary person should be able to "play with guns" should be in fiction: books, movies, video games, RPGs. I've always enjoyed violent fiction, and it hasn't turned me into any type of serial killer. These fucking assholes that are killing people are profoundly disturbed individuals looking for an outlet of violence (perhaps they don't have enough fiction in their lives) and would be doing so regardless of exposure to violent media images.

The best thing we can do is take the guns out of hands...limit the harm they can perpetrate.

Tonight, my prayers are with the families of today's victims. I really do wish I could offer more to them. Hopefully, they will find the strength in their hearts to persevere through this time of trial. For them, their "end of days" must truly feel like it's upon them. I hope sane heads in our government will see this issue and problem for what it is and work to ensure a tragedy like this can never again occur.

Pax.

Milking the Ca$h Cow (One More Time)

I'm surprised I haven't read anything on my regular blogs regarding the reissue of D&D 3.5 by Wizards of the Coast...not even a wry chuckle or sardonic remark. But perhaps, like me, you folks have all been uber-busy. Hell, I don't even know if I'll make my 20 year high school reunion this weekend (though part of that might be being generally broke)...but my morbid curiosity to see how far we've all slid over the years is pretty compelling.

Anyway, I've been on single parent duty pretty much all week and work's been a total bear (AND I haven't had access to Ye Old Internet at work), so I feel I have a valid excuse for not mentioning it. But...well, I have a few minutes this morning in the quiet of sipping coffee with the wife, beagles, and baby all sleeping soundly upstairs (I'm running late for work anyway due to having to put the baby back to sleep around 6ish...no, no...nothing to give me sympathy about, I'd rather be doing that than going to work anyway...).

It must have been Monday or Tuesday that Diego and I were over at Gary's Games in Greenwood (part of normal constitutional around the bario) when I spotted the hardcover 3.5s coming out of their recent shipment. I thought it was pretty bizarre to tell the truth...I mean I hadn't seen anything about it or announcements that WotC was going to do this (not that I follow WotC's news boards or anything but I selfishly expect other bloggers to do so and thus keep me informed of the latest-greatest). However, in scanning back through the internet it looks like there was some mention of this as early as July regarding a "premium edition" of 3.5 being released, similar to the commemorative AD&D books.

Well, I don't know if the errata from earlier printings has been cleaned up, but these 3.5 books don't look especially "premium" to me...that is, they look exactly like the earlier issuance of 3.5, albeit shrink-wrapped and with $50 price tags (the folks at Gary's tell me the interior is the exact same). In fact, they look kind of like someone at the warehouse just found a few dusty piles of unsold books and decided to see if they could get one more cash infusion from the gullible public prior to the release of their D&D Next reiteration. The really amusing part (I really did have a good chuckle with Tim when I saw the books front-and-center on the "new book" shelf yesterday) is that they're still plenty of near-mint condition 3.5 books in Gary's used section. Previously those were being sold for $50 but now they've been discounted down to $30 or so...but wow, I can't figure why anyone would want to buy this stuff, new or used.

I mean, don't the WotC diehard supporters want to own the latest version number (whether that's 4th or the soon-to-be 5th)? Haven't the disgusted 3.5 devotees already found their niche with Paizo and Pathfinder? Haven't the old geezers like myself already decided to spurn the whole lot and either play the oldest versions and/or write our own?

To me, it's a bit pathetic (thought amusing, as said): it really does look like they're just cleaning out the closets and hoping to get a little scratch in the process...a kind of "last garage sale of the summer" kind o thang. Whether or not this is real, serious business stratagem of some sort...well, I really don't see how it can be. I mean, why would you do such a thing? How could this benefit the coming 5th edition (let alone the existing 4th?). To whose nostalgia is 3.5 supposed to appeal? Who exactly is the target audience?

I really don't get it, but it does tickle my funny bone. Maybe it is supposed to be a joke...though I wonder at whose expense?

: )

This May Elicit Cries of Scandal From Some...

But I really hope the new Hobbit movie contains at least a few songs in it.

One of the things I really enjoyed in the Rankin/Bass (animated) version of The Hobbit was the music. Sorry, I did. I know it irritates some (my wife can't stand that grating "Greatest Adventure" theme song), but most of the songs were a part of the book (all the goblin tunes, the elves' songs, the dwarves as well). For me, the music lends an almost primeval fantasy feeling to the whole film which makes it a favorite of mine, even to this day. When I re-read the book (as I do on occasion) I invariably find myself humming the tunes from the RB film when I get to Tolkien's poetry.

Anyway, cutting the music out of the new film would make it feel much less like The Hobbit to me. I would like to see the film end up as a good fantasy adventure story, not some slick badass action film with dwarves and elves and wizards.

But that's just me.

The Madness Has Abated

My wife helped me see how ridiculous my recent D20 Star Wars obsession had become...or as she put it, "you need to finish one project before you start going off on another!" Not that Star Wars my "secret project" mentioned earlier...but it certainly was eating up my time (especially cutting into my sleep time), and keeping me from the things I have to finish.

For instance, I've received another four illustrations for the B/X Companion...more beautiful stuff I might add...and have been in contact with another illustrator. Unfortunately, the cover artist I was attempting to hire has fallen through, so now I need to get someone who knows how to paint OR try to mock something up myself that my buddy can "color" for me. Neither prospect is especially appealing, but I really want a REAL cover illo, not some plain-wrapper cover (reminds me of Spinal Tap's Black Album).

The adventure for the B/X Companion still needs to be finished up, especially the maps which need to go to the Good Doctor for finishing. Doc is actually working on an adventure module for the "secret project" and he's been starting to pester me for the chargen and combat rules...something else I need to finish writing!

SO...no more Star Wars posts, at least for awhile. Certainly not about D20...I'm actually fed up with it.

Oh chargen is fun, if extremely complex and fiddly (finally found out why some of the character write-ups in the core rules have a mysterious extra "+1" bonus in their attack stats: a sidebar on lightsabers gives characters a bonus when using a self-crafted weapon)...and combat is...well, it's a good step up from D20 3rd edition. I certainly prefer the skill rules in the Saga Edition to any other version of D20 I've seen, though that's not saying much.

But the starship rules are the real deal-breakers.

Personal combat using maps and grids is one thing. But dogfights in space need to be more abstract by necessity, at least if one is playing an RPG and not an "X-Wing simulator" video game. Unfortunately, D20 Star Wars treats ship-to-ship combat pretty much the same as personal combat (ships just being extensions of their characters) right down to two-dimensional grid combat. Definitely not what I'm looking for...

I pulled out my WEG Star Wars and compared the two and once again was thoroughly impressed with their handling of the same subject. In fact, the more I read it the more I find I prefer A LOT of the D6 Star Wars game, despite its lack of cool "combat effects" (feats, talents, etc.) or "customizable character creation."

WEG Star Wars still has problems for me, though. The advancement is too slow, the force "powers" are too clunky and ugly, the "backseat to the film NPCs" extremely annoying. Plus it doesn't take into account the Prequel films, which is problematic in some regards. And I have to admit, I get a little tired of rolling handfuls of dice just to add them all together (if you're just looking for one number, why not roll one or two dice and add bonuses? Sheesh!). Also, it's promotion of "fudging" goes against MY dice-rolling sensibilities (aren't there already Force points and metagame mechanics to take into account the heroic nature of the player characters?).

So while WEG did many things right, it still has flaws...ones that make me put it back on the shelf.

D20 Star Wars will be keeping it company, I'm afraid. It's very pretty but it's SO complex I can't see playing it. I mean, I'm sure if I logged several hours of game play, I could memorize most of the fiddly bits (just as I memorized all those rules regarding Weapon Speed Factors and segments back in my old AD&D days). But I just don't have the time and patience for it. Nor the time and patience to find like-minded players. One of the problems I had when I WAS playing 3rd edition D&D was the inability to find players that were on the same page. The games I played in (instead of as a DM) I found that I knew more than the DMs regarding the rules and spent a lot of time explaining the finer points of tumbling and attacks of opportunity and such...and when I had players that KNEW the rules, they were universally gamist munchkins and min-maxers I found incredibly annoying (both as a DM and as a fellow player).

Ugh...I know, I know...I'm a big fat whiner.

Anyway, that's the end of the SWD20 posts for a good long while (and here I was starting to get tempted to do more than browse that Rebel Era Sourcebook - *shudder*). In fact, the next time I talk about Star Wars at all, it may well be to promote my own SW look-alike RPG. After all, Wizards has given up the IP rights to the RPG...I don't think it would be too difficult to build a better mouse trap.

Yes, yes...one project at a time. Got it.

; )