ASC Review: Wavecrash Maze

Wavecrash Maze (LouisJo)

OSRIC for five to seven PCs of levels 4th-6th

I am reviewing these in the order they were submitted. For my review criteria, please check out this post. All reviews will (probably) contain *SPOILERS*; you have been warned! Because these are short (two page) adventures, it is my intention to keep the reviews brief.

I'm not going to lie: this one is a difficult one to parse. I'm guessing English is not the author's first language.

However, it's not just idiosyncratic writing...the layout is a bit confusing. 

Let's get down to it: this adventure is like a fever dream...like the designer spent a long weekend playing D&D, then fell asleep, had a crazy dream, woke up, and used it as inspiration for this thing. Except that, rather than actually DRAW a map, he went to mazegenerator.net (literally...he credits this site on his cover page) to randomly create the labyrinth that would fit the idea that came from a dream.

I won't bother to detail the thing. It's weird. It's wild. It was (apparently) play-tested by eight players. Is that two different sessions? Unclear.

The only treasure in this thing is a wand of ice (undigested in the belly of a giant adder), five "altar plaques" worth 300 g.p. each, and a 450# "melted platinum blob" worth 11K. No. This is not The Way.

I know OSRIC is pretty close to AD&D. This is NOT close to AD&D. One (*) star.

ASC Review:Monastery Of The Fallen Star

The Monastery of the Fallen Star (armitage)

S&W (OD&D) adventure for four to five PCs of levels 2nd & 3rd

I am reviewing these in the order they were submitted. For my review criteria, please check out this post. All reviews will (probably) contain *SPOILERS*; you have been warned! Because these are short (two page) adventures, it is my intention to keep the reviews brief.

All right...finally. 

Here we go: an honest-to-goodness adventure site in the form of a local, abandoned monastery that is now the HQ of some gnollish bandits. 12 keyed locations (really just 10 with some 'added color') with multiple entrances and lots of "stuff" going on.

Treasure is good for its level range: 4,600 (expected is 3,600-5K), and not unreasonable; magic items are of the expendable type typical for low-level adventures. Danger is good: six encounters plus a trap. Gnolls are no joke, but there are few enough that they shouldn't be an issue. Some nice whimsy here with the shadow librarian and "Pickles" the owlbear (great use of her cave/second entrance).

The obsidian egg could be tightened. How does one "chip away" adamantite? How many suits of magic armor can one make? If this was AD&D, I'd point out that this is not how you get enchanted gear, but it would make a good source of "special material" for a wizard working such an enchantment.  But all that's a minor gripe.

This is solid D&D. Easy ****.

ASC Review: Prophet's Spiral

The Prophet's Spiral (Ben Gibson)

AD&D adventure for PCs of levels 3rd-5th

I am reviewing these in the order they were submitted. For my review criteria, please check out this post. All reviews will (probably) contain *SPOILERS*; you have been warned! Because these are short (two page) adventures, it is my intention to keep the reviews brief.

Why, Ben? Why are you doing this to me?

Gibson's adventure site is too big for an adventure site, exceeding the parameters of HIS OWN CONTEST, which (based on precedent already set in prior entries) should disqualify him. From his own contest. Sheesh.

But there are other issues. Let's talk about those.

An adventure for PCs with an average level of 4th. No number given though the author credits five play-testers. So...four to six? Maybe?

Which would mean an expected treasure take in the 40K to 50K range. And the thing DOES have 46K and change but despite its abundance it feels...mudcore? Statues worth 2K that are actually petrified priestesses (bad precedent, as it invites gaming petrification monsters for treasure creation). A half-ton of silver plates and junk worth 5K. A ceramic urn filled with olive oil that is worth 300 g.p. A pile of 15K electrum coins. An ivory throne and an alabaster altar (no weight given but presumably pretty hefty). No magic items to speak of save for a couple scrolls of cure light wounds and three scrolls with permanence?

And just what are we doing here anyway? 

This site is so odd. It's something like a temple with an oracular cyclops chained in the basement. There's a bunch of weirdness: a "mystic cyclops" priest, his giant-blooded consort, a medusa that donates her hair to make cat-o-nine-tail lashes (that petrify instead of poisoning? Um...ok). And a bunch of acolytes just waiting to be slaughtered. I mean, nothing's overtly hostile here except for the wandering ghost that won't attack "unless angry" (but is described as vengeful and demanding the death of descrators...ok)...which is a pretty beefy monster for 4th level characters.

This thing is off the rails. I guess it's worth *** because players could decide to raid the place, but the denizens aren't going to put up much of a fight except for Una and his Consort. This is playable, but I don't like it, and it doesn't feel much like AD&D to me (see the MM2 for cyclopskin). Sorry, Ben.

Coming Together

Another interlude. The reviews will continue tomorrow; just pushed 'em back for a day.

Sunday afternoon I had a chance to watch the Seattle Seahawks clinch a Super Bowl berth for only the fourth time in their 50 year history. I've attended three of the four NFC championship games that they won, missing only the game versus the 49ers (when I was residing in Paraguay). The 'Hawks have had a great season, and man, that was a tough game...another time and on a neutral field, the results might well have been different. Skaven are a bad match-up for orks, and the Rams have often had our number since we moved back to the NFC West in 2000.

I haven't written much about the Seahawks (or Blood Bowl) this year, in part because I've been super busy (I don't think we've broken out the BB set since September) but ALSO because...as the writing was on the wall that Seattle was fielding one of the best teams in the NFL, I felt more and more that talking about it might, well, jinx it. And I didn't want to jinx it. I mean, I had to help keep the Pope's streak alive, right?

But now we're back in the Big Game, where I fully expect Mike Macdonald's ork squad to stomp the living hell out of the dark elves. It's not that Vrabel's not a good coach or that Drake Maye isn't a nice surprise this season. It's just that they aren't Bellicheck and Brady...and I trust that with two weeks to prepare Mac will have this team tuned and ready to tee off on the second year QB. This is not the McVay-Stafford-Nakua offense we just saw. Yes, the Seahawks might still lose...but if they do. it's going to be due to some catastrophic system failure. They're just the better team...this year.

I'm thinking something in the 27-9, 31-6 range?

REGARDLESS (that is, win or lose) the streets of Seattle will be mostly empty on Super Bowl Sunday. That I've experienced before. It's always fairly dead on this, our country's unofficial national holiday, but in the city of one of the two championship-vying teams...well, most people are going to be glued to their screens. Or, at least, engaging in some sort of party/celebration with fellow Seattle-ites, regardless of whether or not they have any interest in the game results. That's the power of sport: the power to bring people together. Common ground...a way of making connections with our fellow human beings.

Right now, in addition to the nation-wide blizzard/Ice Age that's wrecking crap all over the country, we've got this whole ongoing issue of federal agents MURDERING PEOPLE in Minnesota. I mean, the current presidential administration has been nothing if not an extensive exercise in corruption and criminality, bribery, kidnapping, lying, extortion, and murder (no, Virginia, the actions taken by our U.S. military in Venezuela and off its coast are not "lawful" no matter what lies the administration spins). But video of masked "law enforcement" officers pumping ten rounds in the back of a prone, restrained, and unarmed individual is FUCKING EVIL SHIT and kind of ANTITHETICAL TO EVERYTHING THIS COUNTRY IS SUPPOSED TO STAND FOR. 

I'd think most of us could find some common ground on that, too. 

Just so people know: I am paying attention. And while the gaming thing is all well and good as a nice little escape from the ho-hum mundanity of daily life (and fun to boot), it's NOT a great thing to use it as an excuse to check out and be apathetic when it comes to real life atrocities being committed in one's own backyard. Yeah, the stuff in Gaza and Ukraine and Iran, etc. are pretty damn horrific. But now our government seems bent on waging war against its own citizens? Any citizen that dares stand up to it? Anyone who interferes with ICE actions by protesting or filming with a cell phone is in danger of being pepper-sprayed, beaten, "detained," and possibly SHOT IN THE FACE. Yeah...no.

Can't stand for that.

However, sadly, unfortunately, the LAST thing, the WORST thing for folks to do, is to fight back with anger and hate and violence. I can already see that possibility on the horizon: revolution. Civil war. Guerillas. REAL "domestic terrorism" where anyone with a mask or a badge is dragged out and lynched and a well-armed America population starts pushing back with bullets. THAT would be the real end of this American Experiment. That would be really, really shitty.

Plus, Trump would just invoke martial law and set himself up as "Dictator for Life."

SO. Be brave. Be resistant. Be engaged. And most of all, be TOGETHER with your fellow Americans. Regardless of the differences you have with them. Build bonds; build connections. Stand and oppose, but do not give in to hatred and violence. If we allow grief and anger to consume us, then evil wins. 

That's it. Adventure reviews will resume tomorrow.

ASC Review: Necropolis Of The Forgotten Hero

Necropolis of the Forgotten Hero (zs.gothpunk)

"Old school adventure" for four to six PCs of levels 1st-3rd

I am reviewing these in the order they were submitted. For my review criteria, please check out this post. All reviews will (probably) contain *SPOILERS*; you have been warned! Because these are short (two page) adventures, it is my intention to keep the reviews brief.

Oh, good...another adventure I can immediately disqualify as it fails to meet the requirement of actually being designed for a particular system.

[play-testers include a "chaotic drow level 2"...there is no such class as "Drow" in any TSR-era edition of D&D ever]

Too bad because the size is good, and the map is nice and...oh. Oh.

[sorry, just reading this]

Okay, so this is a whole story/set-up scenario thing. Rather than an adventure site. There is a "Dark Lord" (*sigh*) who is a GHOUL.  Ghouls, in AD&D have "low" intelligence (INT of 5-7), "their change from human to ghoul having deranged and destroyed their minds." Hardly "Dark Lord" material.

Oh my gosh. He even has human servants of the Dark Lord. Humans following a ghoul. 

Hard to tell if the treasure adds up as this isn't written for a particular system and magic items don't count as x.p.-worthy treasure in all old school systems. Regardless this gets only * (one-star) for showing an incomplete understanding of D&D.

ASC Review: Albarino's Icy Cellar

Albarino's Icy Cellar (Zoranu)

AD&D adventure for five to eight PCs of levels 6th-8th

I am reviewing these in the order they were submitted. For my review criteria, please check out this post. All reviews will (probably) contain *SPOILERS*; you have been warned! Because these are short (two page) adventures, it is my intention to keep the reviews brief.

All right! More AD&D!

Mm.

Mmm.

*sigh*

Okay, this is another REALLY BIG "adventure site." It's pretty much a full-blown adventure. 30 encounter areas over two levels. Let me check...ah, yes, the contest rules state:

"8-24 keyed locations"

So...disqualified, I guess.

This one is...okay. Theming is okay, if weird. A white dragon moves into a dwarf stronghold; only a group of derro (not really dwarves) remain. Even though the dragon has stolen all their treasure, too?

Except that they have access to treasure far in excess of the dragon's hoard.

I'll give a brief rundown, despite the DQ. Nerfed derro for no-good reason: "Derro MR and Spells adjusted downward from S4 baseline." [also from MM2 baseline] Why, exactly? Gygax's rules not good enough for you? If you deem them too tough for the adventure, then why are you putting them in the adventure?

Threat level is a little cheap for a party of 7th levels PCs. Oh, the dragon is okay, but there's a lot of empty on the map. 

And the TREASURE...hoo-boy! Expected yield should be in the 350K range...instead we get something approaching 615K or more (it is my personal belief that the x.p./g.p. value of girdles of giant strength are off by a factor of 10 due to a typo in the DMG). Zoranu lists the "subdued dragon sell price" as 2.5 million gold pieces. No...please check the MM (p.30) in which it lists the price as 100-800 g.p. per hit point of the dragon. While the MM is explicit that "this price is subject to adjustment by the referee" clearly raising the normal maximum of 44,800 to 2,500,000 is a bridge too far...especially given the already outrageous haul of treasure in this adventure.

Some other nitpicks are here (what exactly does a "dwarf/human hybrid" look like? A derro? Then why not say "derro"...) but the main issues are as listed: too easy, too many "gimmes," too much treasure, too many encounters, not enough traps/hazards (and multiple cursed scrolls don't count in my book)...

I DID like the shadow demon embedded in the normal shadows to make them all but un-turnable (a 7th level cleric only turns a shadow demon on a 20)...very nasty, but the treasure is worth it. I'm okay with the paean. On the other hand, there is no such thing as a "major STR check" in AD&D...and this is noted twice. What the hell are you talking about? Sounds like some 5E b.s. to me.

I'd knock a whole star off this (down to **) because there seems to be some "learning" that needs to be done by the author; trust the game to do its job...there are better ways to design then simply ignoring the existing rules. Not that it matters, since this is too big for an "adventure site."

ASC: Fragments Of Paradise

Fragments of Paradise (K.A.)

OSRIC adventure for PCs of levels 8th-10th

I am reviewing these in the order they were submitted. For my review criteria, please check out this post. All reviews will (probably) contain *SPOILERS*; you have been warned! Because these are short (two page) adventures, it is my intention to keep the reviews brief.

This is an OSRIC adventure; it makes reference to items (bleeding sword, robe of bones, greater cloak of displacement, etc.) that are not part of AD&D.

It is also not an "adventure site" but a full on adventure. Players do not "stumble onto" the place, but are sent there on a mission (multiple mission ideas are provided). The thing is simultaneously too big (the Dyson Logos map is of a city with dozens of buildings) and too small (only 7 keyed encounter locations...outside the 8-24 of the contest parameters). For these infractions, this is yet another entry I would simply disqualify.

A mid-high level adventure site...except that it's not an adventure site. Whatever. The author throws a perpetually regenerating evil reversed deva with laser eyes into the thing as the main antagonist. Because...high level, I guess?

Gygax was right the first time not to include angels in his game. Throwing devas and solars and such into it just wants to make DMs want to use them to fight PCs. Trashy.

Let's see, what else: 12 hill giants with a "shaman" (no spells given, though he wears a robe of bones). Five invisible banshees. A house shrouded in "permanent darkness and silence" with four black puddings in stasis for PCs to bump into. A giant white gemstone with a 200K value that doesn't matter because the PCs are supposed to destroy it that traps souls without saving throw and possesses PCs. 

Yeah. This isn't an adventure for levels 8th-10th...not even in OSRIC. Sorry.

The whole scenario culminates with the summoning of an astra deva who cleanses the whole thing in "a storm of divine fire."  Can't happen soon enough, in my opinion.

Yes, K.A. -- I'm a big jerk. I don't like this one. It's mythic and grandiose, but it's also style over substance. 8th-10th level doesn't call for "mythic and grandiose." Tomb of Horrors is just a crypt raid and that's for levels 10th-14th.  Back to the drawing board. Even if it wasn't a DQ, this would be * for me.