Soccer Haze

Soccer. I'm going to write about soccer. It's not D&D. We'll see if I can tie it into D&D (somehow), but writing out what's in my head at the moment will...hopefully...clear space for the D&D-type stuff folks want me to write about.

This year, due to a lack of sufficient players in any single school, my son's school team is partnered with three other schools. We have a total of 21 kids on the team (at this level...6th grade...we play 9v9) fifteen of whom I'd never met before this year. It's...a lot.

Because we joined them (rather than vice versa), the team does not operate under our school name. For the first time in...mm...six years, I was not expecting to be the coach. Truth be told, I wasn't expecting Diego to want to play, not with all the club soccer he's already doing and after an extremely difficult season last fall.

[last year, our 5th grade class was combined with 4th graders due to them not having a coach or sufficient players...4th graders who, for the most part, were entirely new to soccer or who had not played since pre-Covid. When they were, like, seven years old and coached (poorly) by a volunteer parent. Suffice is to say our team was NOT competitive...at all!...and this caused a LOT of frustration, tears, breakdowns, etc. among ALL the players on the team]

But Diego did want to play, and so did all the kids from last year (minus Maceo who moved to a different school). And, somehow, I got wrangled into being the assistant coach for this year's team. 

I think I mentioned it's a lot of kids?

Anyway. The head coach...I'll call him "HC." He's a nice guy. Totally on the same page with me as far as what's important (kids participating in sport, kids having fun, kids learning valuable life lessons like team work and sportsmanship and effort). Good guy. Not a soccer guy. 

Football guy, yes. Baseball guy, yes. Soccer guy, no.

He told me I could handle the "strategy side" of things if I wanted. His plan for the season was to have one practice a week, consisting of a warm up (he has the baseball guys on the team lead the team in a baseball warm up) and then have the kids just scrimmage each other for the remainder of practice. Because we have so many kids.

The kids from his school include some "really athletic kids" on it. He's not kidding. Many of them are big, strong, and fast. They play flag football on the side. Some of them play "select" soccer and/of baseball. Some also run cross country...right now, during the soccer season. In past seasons, his M.O. has been to put the best athletes up front and the "less strong" kids on defense and let them "kind of figure out their own positions." He won a lot of games the last couple years, mainly, because he had better athletes on his team than other teams. Teams like the team we fielded last year.

Our school doesn't have kids with the raw athletic talent of these kids. They have my boy who, despite being a short, skinny, slow kid (much like his father was, back in the day) is blessed with a pair of incredibly strong, accurate boots, excellent coordination, a wicked intelligence, and a tenacious, ultra-competitive fire. We were blown out every game last year, but we were never shut out because Diego would always find a way to score a goal or two and salvage our school's dignity. And I only ever played him as much as any of the other players (in CYO sports, we are trying to give equal participation time to ALL the players). 

The other kids on the school range from "high motor/effort" to "passable" to "struggling" to "hopeless." I've always seen it as MY role to coach them up and put them in the best possible positions to succeed and contribute (thereby having an enjoyable time and...hopefully...continuing to pursue sport as a fun activity). Until last season, I was always able to do that...with positive, productive results.

SO...enter me and the new team and the new HC. As the kids are now in middle school, this is the first season that results count and that there are "play-offs" in CYO. Kids who don't enjoy soccer or who have decided it "isn't for them" have dropped out...perhaps to pursue flag football or other fall sports. Teams are larger...we're not the only team that's combined schools. Several non-Catholic private middle schools are a part of our league...many with expensive athletic facilities, paid coaches, and (I kid thee not) sports nutrition programs. It's still Catholic Youth Organization where "winning isn't the most important thing" (and where, if you beat a team by more than six goals, you have to appear before the board and explain why you are not adhering to the values of sportsmanship, etc.)...but, still, it's Big Boy soccer. We have seven weeks to accumulate enough points to be one of the top eight teams.

So, I convinced the HC to have two practices a week instead of one, with the rationale that the kids who could make both (because they're not participating in multiple sports) probably could use the extra practice. I convinced him to let me run some drills every practice (before scrimmage) and not just "make kids run." I convinced him that maybe when a kid says he plays "defense" on his select soccer team that he's suitable to play defense, not just striker (because he's big, fast, and strong).

The first week, I spent evaluating the kids, getting to know them. Our first game, I wanted to implement a formation that I thought would play to our strengths. He asserted himself as HC, however, saying the kids would just get confused, wanting to keep it "basic." I deferred to him, though I put forth very strong opinions of which role various kids should play (and why) and HC, to his credit, went with most of my suggestions. 

Our first game was tight...we went down 2-0 before coming back to even, then going ahead 3-2, only to give up the equalizer, before finally (finally) wearing them out and finishing 6-3. And I mean "wearing them out:" we played 19 kids against a team that had 9 total (no subs) and just ground them down with fresh legs. They were tough and played with a lot of heart, even playing (and scoring!) with eight men after one of their defenders took a smoked shot off the face and had to sit down for a few.

Afterwards, HC was positive and (mostly) effusive with his praise, mainly citing "areas of improvement" as being the defense...half of which had been ALL my school's kids save Diego (who played midfield).  One mother later contacted the coaches and apologizing for their son's performance, and asking if there were extra things he could practice to "train up"...when I spoke with her later she related that he had been disappointed with himself because the other kids had been yelling at him for letting in the scores (he was not playing goalie).

...

Mm.

For week #2, I told HC I wanted to implement the formation I'd talked about (a 3-1-3-1) as I felt it would give us a stronger defense, and told him I would coach the kids up on it during the week and make it work. He grudgingly agreed to this because our second opponent had just gotten their asses kicked 10-1 in their first week ("this should be a pretty easy one, so a good time to implement new stuff"). He also didn't trust one of the kids who'd be playing goalie (we let the players volunteer for the position and rotate from week-to-week...this week would be one of the "less proficient" kids from my school). We would also be playing without two of our best offensive pieces: a kid with blazing speed who plays striker for the same club as Diego (however, a year up due to an earlier birth year), and an insolent snot-nosed punk of a kid who only knows how to shoot goals (he's a real piece of work...think Jaimie Tartt in miniature).  Little did we know, that our BEST player (in HC's opinion) would spend most of the game on the sideline, getting a bloody nose in the first half.

We won the game 6-0. The last fifteen minutes we just played keep away from the other team, so as not to violate the "lopsided victory" rule. Four of our goals came from assists. It was some lovely soccer.

We are entering the third week (practice...the "extra" one I requested...is today, Tuesday). HC will not be at the game Saturday ("you can do the line-up however you want this week!") as he is going on a camping trip with several of the boys. And I don't even know if my own kid will be available...we're still waiting on his other team's schedule for the weekend.

[the problem with participating in two different soccer teams is that sometimes there are schedule conflicts (duh) and then hard choices have to be made. In our home, we leave this choice up to the kids...even though one team costs about a hundred bucks and the other one costs...mm. I'd rather not think about it. Suffice is to say we've been navigating this conflict the last five+ years]

I know, I know...this is all dumb-ass drama and not worth stressing out. Absolutely right. But I have been stressed...in a year where I thought the soccer season would be, well, stress-free (because I didn't think I'd have to do much, if anything) suddenly I have been experiencing more stress than I have in years. Which is crazy, yeah, I know.

Fact is, I love these kids...my own child not least of all. But the other kids, both the old hands from previous years and the new ones (who are all, rather quickly, growing on me...yes, even the mouthy ones). They're just kids. Well behaved for the most part. Good teammates for the most part. Doing the best they can...for the most part. How can you not love these kids? And want them to have success? For their own sake?

Let's tie this to D&D for a sec. All the games I've run the last couple years have been for kids this age...my son, his peers, etc. And I've prepped the hell out of these games BECAUSE I WANT THEM TO HAVE A GOOD EXPERIENCE. Because I want them to enjoy themselves. Because I want them to come back. Because D&D is awesome and it's something they can do and play and enjoy their whole lives.

Soccer...soccer is awesome, too. For kids this age, it's unlikely to do any permanent harm to their bodies. It's solid exercise. It's good training, not just in the physical realm (speed, stamina, flexibility, agility, etc.) but in the arenas of teamwork and camaraderie, sportsmanship, focus, and discipline. Players learn to both win AND lose with grace and dignity and how to play with respectfulness and gratitude (for their teammates, their coaches, their opponents, and for themselves). Soccer isn't something they can do forever (unlike D&D) but while they have this window of time, I want to instill a love of the game in them. I prep the hell out of my soccer practices and games, too.

My son...he already knows all this stuff. He and I have had long talks about both D&D and sports and why they're valuable and to what degree and their place in the grand sphere of...well, of everything. I'm not really worried about him. He'll give 110% and do his best to win, and shake hands respectfully when he loses while vowing to learn from the experience. Ultra-competitor that Diego is, his head is screwed on right most of the time (probably part of why his premier club coach named him captain of the team this year. Last year he was named captain by the coach, too...and it was a different coach). 

It's the other kids, I'm coaching for. Not my kid, who's already won trophies and has plenty of confidence. No, it these other 11 and 12 year olds...the ones who aren't "great athletes" and, probably, even the ones who are (I've noticed some ego cracks here and there). Because I want them ALL to see their own potential...and to see the potential in each other. Everyone contributes on this team...the team is the sum of all of us.

*sigh* Two practices to prepare. Against the only undefeated team left on our schedule till the playoffs...a team that just spanked some poor bastards 7-1 last week. Notice the goal differential? Another "mercy rule" game...this team is good.  And we will again be missing the same two offensive weapons, at least three defenders, and possibly Diego.  Three other "maybes," too...none of which I want to lose. 12 players. Not a lot to work with. And no help that I can count on from HC, bless his large, carefree heart.

Damn. Better make these good practices.